I think this is the first time since I joined the organization, I saw my best friends Raju & Tushar fight like crazy and argue over an issue & it made me realize something. Even though I tried my best to resolve the issue but they just wouldn’t listen or stop fighting.
Although it made me really sad, on the same day, I thought a lot about it as they both really matter to me. When I met Raju, he used to get angry over petty issues and it used to take him a while to get back to normal. But, over the year, he drastically changed and worked on his anger. While Tushar, on the other hand, had a completely opposite personality than his. They have been such great friends with each other. But sometimes situations and people can create differences between even the best of friends.
I was trying to be a fixer like Fevicol but realized even Fevicol can’t fix everything!
A happy realization is that we honestly can’t fix everything in our life, so how can we fix others. But all we can do is, give it a try. We play a major role in the life of our friends, with the people we spent so much time with. All we can do is love them and support them and not to fix their issues. Like until we realize something from within, we don’t do it. For eg., we can’t make anyone say sorry if he/she doesn’t want to. Similarly, we can’t someone say I love you if he/she simply doesn’t feel that way.
We should try and give them the time to heal themselves if they have been hurt. If a person is dealing with some issues or feelings, it is not at all your responsibility to heal or change the person. Sometimes Self Help is the biggest help. I can say this now because Raju & Tushar got back to normal after a while. They hold no grudges of the past and moved on. Meet every day happily, sit together smilingly & travel together too.
Be a Trier instead of a Fixer!
I have faith and trust in both of them. One can only change when they really want to change. The whole fight began with a different issue and ended with another issue. You cannot solve someone’s problem at work or a relationship with his/her girlfriend or boyfriend, it is something they will do themselves.
Being a trier will bring your mind at peace, at least it did to mine. Neither can I fix my life completely nor anyone else. Sometimes we should leave some matters unfixable. We should find joy and happiness in small moments and let things flow. In the kind of society, we are living in we can only try and do something for others and ourselves. Little progress each day adds up to beautiful memories.
Play a significant role without fixing!
Raju & Tushar are two wonderful people in my life. They both are simply irreplaceable. I was trying to fix their issue because I was trying to prevent them from experiencing pain after the fight. But I learned this is not how it works, although it made me stress out too. Days are incomplete if one of them is missing. Sometimes it is difficult to be out of a situation like what happened, and let them fight as much as they want to.
But one has to give time. There can be days of cold war and silence but in the end, if you truly love and care for the person, things will work out. A person and the relationship we have with him/her is way more important than just trying to prove what is wrong or who is wrong. You simply can’t be a Fevicol but all you can do is just try and help. If it is meant to be it will fix, if it is not in God’s will it won’t. You don’t have control over everything.
I guess they both learned a lesson from whatever happened. You both are my pillars and I know you are smiling while reading this. But you both fighting is the last thing I want to see! So please, don’t ever fight again and if you do RESOLVE IT FAST!
Sorry for fighting. It will not happen again. I am very touched reading this. thank you for giving me an important place in your life. Thank you for being the caring person that you are & for being simply you.
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